Effortless

I was up all night again.
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Was about to doze off to the constant ring of questions in my head. A thousand what ifs, a hundred buts, a million scenarios playing out as the blurry becomes REM. Then I awoke to the sound of my phone ringing, mother checking in from Vietnam.

Couldn't go back to sleep after that.

Here's the thing: the little things I used to sweat seem effortless these days. The thought of being comfortable with the lull and the ability to choose freely at any point sometimes scare the shit out of me. But thinking about it, I've never been hampered by anything or anyone other than my fear of everything and everyone.

Now, I'm just here. Ready for anything - and by ready I mean ready to accept or reject whatever life chooses to subject me to.